The Waiting Room

There were 24 people inside the waiting room of a clinic in a moderately sketchy section of the city where the southern fringes of Hollywood meet the northern border of Koreatown. I sat among them for three hours this afternoon and in between chapters of The Omnivore's Dilemma, and outlining a piece for PokerNews I watched them. A lot. There really wasn't much else to do as I waited until 3:30 p.m. to be seen for my 12:45 appointment. All of us had one thing in common-- we had no health insurance.

Number of women: 22

Number of men: 2

Number of flamingly gay men: 1

Number of women carrying Louis Vuitton purses: 2

Number of women carrying Chanel totes : 1

Retail price of a Chanel 2.55: $2,250

Number of students from Hollywood High School: 5

How many of those students were passing the time by doing homework?: 0

How many textbooks were in their backpacks?: 0

Really?: Not a one.

How do I know they were from Hollywood High School? The student IDs around their necks.

Number of people reading books in the room: 3

Ethnicities of people reading books: White, Filipino, Asian

Number of people using texting devices and/or cell phones: 15

How many of those devices were iPhones? 11

Bad television shows that played out during my wait time: Some sort of talk show, Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader?, and Divorce Court.

People who were playing along with Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader? 4

Number of them who are smarter than a fifth grader: 1

Number of phone calls the actress sitting next to me received from her agent: at least 10

Number of auditions she missed while waiting for her 1:30 "appointment": seemingly one really important one

Total time spent in waiting room: 2 hours, 46 minutes

Total bill for a year's supply of birth control: $769.00

Number of times I said "fuck" out loud after being presented with the bill: at least 3

So that breaks down to... what exactly?: $2.11 a day to not burden myself, my boyfriend and society-at-large with a child. Which actually is a lot cheaper than actually having one.

Silver lining: At least I was home by 4:20.

This Month at PokerNews

It's been a crazy month at Casa Change. In addition to my daily duties at PokerNews, I covered the WCOOP for PokerStars Blog and didn't see the sun for many many days. Which was mostly OK with me, because the basin has been quite the inferno these past few weeks. That, and I love the weird shit that comes on television around 4:30 a.m., like infomercials for fitness contraptions and 1980's movies-of-the-week. Still, the nocturnal hangover lingers a week later, as I continually fall asleep at random times during the day and still feel no desire to head to sleep before three in the morning.

Just in case you missed it, here's a look at some of the pieces I wrote for PokerNews this month. The Sebok piece came out yesterday.

Will Joe Sebok's Signing with Ultimate Bet be a Good Thing? (with Michael Friedman)

The Top 10 WCOOP Moments of 2009

2 Months. 2 Million.: How to Build Your Own War Room

The Explosion of Poker Tours Worldwide: Good or Bad for Poker? (with Matthew Parvis)

ESPN's World Series of Poker Coverage: Buy or Sell?

PokerNews Jet Set: Top 10 Travel Tips for Poker Players

PokerNews Jet Set: Aruba

PokerNews Jet Set: London

PokerNews Jet Set: Barcelona

PokerNews Jet Set: Los Angeles

WSOP Main Event on ESPN: Hand of the Week, Our MVP and More

WSOP Main Event on ESPN: Hellmuth's Entrance, Hand of the Week, and Our MVP

WSOP Main Event on ESPN: Fossilman Takes on Costanza, Hand of the Week, and Our MVP

WSOP Main Event on ESPN: The Phil Hellmuth Show

WSOP Main Event on ESPN: Aussies, ElkY, Ivey and More

WSOP Main Event on ESPN: Ivey Dominates Feature Tables as Bubble Bursts

Though I may be an exceptionally lazy blogger when it comes to this space, I do flutter around the Twitterverse daily, if you'd care to follow my half-baked musings there.