Reptilian Kismet
There are many reasons I love my sister. She's a quiet, gentle soul. A budding financial genius who dog-ears Money Magazine and Tivo's Suze Orman in search of her next great stock buy. A tough cookie who hauls a 40-pound camera 15 hours a day on the shoulders of her buck-ten frame.
But this revelation was truly special. I sat next to her at Easter dinner after not having seen her for a month or so.
Me: "So, are you ready for the movie event of the summer?"
Sis: "You mean...SNAKES ON A PLANE?"
Me: "SNAKES ON A PLANE!"
Sis: "SNAKES ON A MOTHERFUCKIN' PLANE!"
(beat)
Dad: "The fuck kind of piece of shit movie is that?"
You all now have serious competition for my +1 to the premiere. I take Stars and Full Tilt transfers...
But this revelation was truly special. I sat next to her at Easter dinner after not having seen her for a month or so.
Me: "So, are you ready for the movie event of the summer?"
Sis: "You mean...SNAKES ON A PLANE?"
Me: "SNAKES ON A PLANE!"
Sis: "SNAKES ON A MOTHERFUCKIN' PLANE!"
(beat)
Dad: "The fuck kind of piece of shit movie is that?"
You all now have serious competition for my +1 to the premiere. I take Stars and Full Tilt transfers...
posted by change100 at 1:26 PM
7 Comments:
oh baby, you KNOW you just have to take me! I will offer up all kinds of bribes and incentives.
Did I tell you have a twelve inch tongue and can breathe out my ears?
And I will name my next-born "Reptilian Kismet."
Has a nice ring.
Suze Orman? The woman is ORANGE. Every time I'm flipping channels and come across her show I spend 10 minutes fiddling with the "tint" and "color" buttons. She must mainline betacarotine tabs.
Suze Orman is a hack. She regurgitates the same basic financial knowledge you can get anywhere. The only original idea she had was targeting women.
Tell your sister to check out Fool.com for better ideas.
I'd go but I don't want to miss "Deal or No Deal"!
My wife can go--I'll handle expenses. That will give me a long weekend for poker. Just let me know when and where to ship her.
I'm with your dad on this one
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