I just folded a J2 offsuit and quit my cash game after losing another $110. It's going to be the last hand I play for a while. I've lost over half my bankroll and I think the only way I can control the bleeding is to stop altogether. Maybe for a few days, maybe for a week. Maybe until I feel like it again. I just don't belong anywhere near a deck of cards right now.
Thank you everyone who wrote such lovely words to me after the my last post. You made me cry good tears. The support means the world to me. Most of the people in my life will never come close to understanding my frustrations with this stupid fucking card game, and I'm incredibly lucky to have you all in my corner.
I tried a couple of different things today. I played a Stud Freeroll on Stars to sharpen my chops for the WPBT- POY stud event that is on the horizon. Check Byron's blog for further details. I'm very inexperienced at stud. I hope I get another lesson from Pauly when he comes back to L.A. (And please send him good wishes... poor guy is in Vegas with tonisilitis! How much does that suck?)
From there I went back to the game that has done the most for me... the Stars 180-person SNG. In my first one I played tight, chopped out small pots early and then went card dead before picking up AK. A loose raiser on my right opened the pot for 3BB and I re-raised all-in for 12BB with 75-150 blinds. I was right about having the guy on my right beat, he had AT, but the SB woke up with QQ and I lost the race. So no real disaster there. I think I'd make that play again.
I fired up another 180 shortly thereafter. In the second level, I picked up JhJs and made it 90 from MP. The SB called and the flop came T K J, two hearts. I bet 180, he min-raised, and I called. Turn is 2h. Not the best card for me, but I do have the Jack of hearts. I move all-in for 1029 and he calls his last 900, turning up KsQc. Of course the 9 arrives on the river for him. Good donkey... thank you for fucking me in the ass... now here's a treat for you. I busted three hands later when my all in with TT was called by QJo who flopped his Q.
I also played a Stars Deep Stacks Limit MTT during all of this. It really is like watching paint dry. 3 1/2 hours to go out in the middle.
Next was a $11 NLHE Full Tilt multi. I'm playing a conservative game early and in the third level or so, I see a free flop from the BB with 47o. There is one LP limper and the SB in the pot. Flop is J43. The SB checks, I throw out a smallish bet, about 1/2 the pot to see if I can just pick it up right there. The first limper folds and the SB calls. I put him on a jack or a draw like 56. The turn is a 4, making me trips. I bet 2/3 of the pot and he raises to 780. I have 1275 behind.
What would you do? I'll share the conclusion of the hand in a later post.
I need some time off from this crazy game. And I need to re-approach it as serious recreation instead of a potential solution to my tenuous income situation because I'm simply not skilled, disciplined or consistent enough for that to even be a factor. I have to get back to my life, whatever that is. I have to decide if I'm going back into the business. And if I wasn't to go back, what would I do?
I should see some movies tomorrow. And see how they make me feel. I'll also be posting Part II of last week's Vegas-to-L.A. adventure and you'll finally all find out whether or not I made out with Nikki the stripper.
You guys are also in dire need of a Showcase-Stacee update... they're still together. Though I'm beginning to think she's a leeeeetle psycho. He's up in the Berkeley this weekend for a bachelor party with all of his old fraternity brothers.
And with the house to myself, I'm going to get high and watch the last 7 episodes of 24.